'Spelling Checker Madness'
Imagine that you are a person with a heavy Hill Billy
accent, and you just bought a computer that came with
Speak and Spell Software installed, and you tried to use it
with the default spoken word interpreter!
All the words produced by the Speak and Spell interpreter
are actual words, although some *are* slang.
I found them in Funk & Wagnall's Standard Desk Dictionary.
Fr. Tom McGahee
My Speak and Spell computerized "spoken word to
text" software still has a few bugs in it.
Here is what I spoke into the microphone:
Speak and Spell Spelling Checker Software
I have a spelling checker
I got with our PC,
it plainly marks for our review
mistakes I cannot see.
When I enter in a word,
I wait for it to say
whether I am right or wrong...
it shows me straight away.
Whenever a mistake is made,
it knows before too late.
Then I can put the error right
(it's really, really great!)
I've run this poem through it,
(I'm sure you're pleased to know.)
It's absolutely perfect!
(My checker told me so!)
Here is the *output* text produced and error
checked by my Speak and Spell software. You will
note that I spoke SLOWLY and have a very
pronounced Hill Billy accent:
Spake Hand Spill Spilling Chequer <So Oft Where>
eye halve ah spilling chigger
eye gut whiff hour pea sea,
hit <plane lea> marquess fore hour <rear vue>
<Miss takes> eye <ken naught> sea.
Win eye inter inn uh word,
eye weight fur hit two sigh
wither eye em riot oar rung...
hit chose me strait aweigh.
endeavor uh <mist ache> his maid,
Hit nose <bee four> two light.
Deny kin putt dee <air oar> rite
(hits rarely, rarely grate!)
Hive rune these pome true hit,
(<eye em> shore yore policed too no.)
eats <Ahab so loot lea> <purr fact>!
(My <Czech err> toll me sew!)
(<Sores uh>: <Hun Gnome>)
>Hive rune these pome true hit,
>(<eye em> shore yore policed too no.)
>eats <Ahab so loot lea> <purr fact>!
>(My <Czech err> toll me sew!)
>(<Sores uh>: <Hun Gnome>)
Boy, was that good! I lived "down there" for a while, and it fit an awful
lot of the locals.
I must have been there too long, though, because some folks didn't realize
I wasn't native when I left!
But, I've recovered.
\ /---\ /
\ | | / Andy Kunz
\ /---\ / Montana Design
/---------+ +---------\ http://www.montanadesign.com
| / |----|___|----| \ |
\/___| * |___\/ Go fast, turn right,
and keep the wet side down!
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