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PICList Thread
'Computers in the movies'
1997\06\12@180009 by Andy Kunz

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Here's one you all can appreciate.  Not exactly PIC-only, but close enough <G>

Andy




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            "The Sixth Sense - The Sense of Humor"
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25 interesting things that you learn about computers in the movies...

1.  Word processors never display a cursor.

2.  You never have to use the spacebar when typing long sentences.

3.  All monitors display 2 inch high letters.

4.  High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA, or
   some such governmental institution, have easy-to-understand
   graphical interfaces.

5.  Those that don't will have incredibly powerful text-based
   command shells that can correctly understand and execute
   commands typed in plain English.

6.  Corollary: You can gain access to any information you want by
   simply typing "ACCESS ALL OF THE SECRET FILES" on any keyboard.

7.  Likewise, you can infect a computer with a destructive virus
   by simply typing "UPLOAD VIRUS."  Viruses cause temperatures in
   computers, just like they do in humans.  After a while, smoke
   billows out of disk drives and monitors.

8.  All computers are connected. You can access the information on
   the villain's desktop computer, even if it's turned off.

9.  Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or whenever
   the screen changes. Some computers also slow down the output on
   the screen so that it doesn't go faster than you can read. The
   *really* advanced ones also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix
   printer as the characters come across the screen.

10.  All computer panels have thousands of volts and flash pots
    just underneath the surface. Malfunctions are indicated by a
    bright flash, a puff of smoke, a shower of sparks, and an
    explosion that forces you backward. See #7, above)

11.  People typing away on a computer will turn it off without
    saving the data.

12.  A hacker can get into the most sensitive computer in the
    world before intermission and guess the secret password in
    two tries.

13.  Any PERMISSION DENIED has an OVERRIDE function.

14.  Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will
    be accomplished in under three seconds. In the movies,
    modems transmit data at two gigabytes per second.

15.  When the power plant/missile site/whatever overheats, all the
    control panels will explode, as will the entire building.

16.  If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes the
    file,it also disappears from the screen.  There are no ways
    to copy a backup file-and there are no undelete utilities.

17.  If a disk has got encrypted files, you are automatically
    asked for a password when you try to access it.

18.  No matter what kind of computer disk it is, it'll be readable
    by any system you put it into.  All application software is
    usable by all computer platforms.

19.  The more high-tech the equipment, the more buttons it has.
    However, everyone must have been highly trained, because
    the buttons aren't labelled.

20.  Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying
    three-dimensional, real-time, photo-realistic animated graphics
    capability.

21.  Laptops, for some strange reason, always seem to have amazing
    real-time video phone capabilities and the performance of a
    CRAY- MP.

22.  Whenever a character looks at a VDU, the image is so bright
    that it projects itself onto his/her face.

23.  Computers never crash during key, high-intensity activities.
    Humans operating computers never make mistakes under stress.

24.  Programs are fiendishly perfect and never have bugs that slow
    down users.

25.  Any photograph can have minute details pulled out of it.
    You can zoom into any picture as far as you want to.  For
    example:

    "What's that fuzzy thing in the corner?  I don't know, let's
    check.

    It's the murder weapon!".  "Let's look under the bed for the
    killers shoes.  no, just some comics books (Marvel 1954, very
    rare).  Let's check the closet shelves..."


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==================================================================
Andy Kunz - Montana Design - 409 S 6th St - Phillipsburg, NJ 08865
         Hardware & Software for Industry & R/C Hobbies
       "Go fast, turn right, and keep the wet side down!"
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